My Story - Wendy

Published on Monday, April 25, 2011 By recoverystories

Since I was a child I always had a love for God. When I was 9 years old I started a ‘ church ‘ and invited all my friends to teach the bible.

In my teenage years, I left God, angry over the circumstances in my life.

Years of anger and hate towards a God who would ‘ allow ‘ it, I drifted way..

When I was 21 , I married a wonderfully stable and loving man who healed my heart. In having a sound mind, I called out again to God, and began to search for meaning.

I joined a Southern Baptist Church became Baptized, and wanted to share the love of God to others.

I read my bible, and believed people go to hell for all eternity based on their choice . I had a passion for evangelism and joined several ministries. At the time I did not realize how much fear , and anxiety shaped this concept of God. it held me captive. But it took years to discover my error. In my  fear based mindset, I spent every ounce of energy I had to share the  ’ Gospel ‘ .  I studied Apologetics,  and learned as much as a I could about Cults’ .

All of this fear and anxiety stole my love and joy for people.  Fear was the core of my faith.   I lost the genuine attribute of love.

How can you love people in spirit and truth  if all you do is fear, fear fear fear ?

So , for 22 yrs. I never questioned the bible. I never had a problem with people being in eternal misery .

One day, I was sharing the ‘ gospel ‘ with a   person who was I believed was in a cult .   I became angry and abusive.  A few days went by and convicted by a Tv commercial..

Kindness and compassion is so rare. God is kind and full of compassion.

Was I kind ? NO. Was I genuine in compassion and love ? NO.

I began to question my faith and my heart.

To conclude, the doctrine of eternal hell was fueling my anger and hate towards others.

I had read the bible, and idolized it to the point that I failed to love God and others, with all my heart, mind and soul.

There is one world, one God and one love.

God loves all people and will save all people everywhere.

No longer do I live in fear. OR anger .

The yoke is light and I am free.

Legalism of ‘ words’ kill. But the spirit gives life.. amen.

Thank you Jesus.. we are all children of God and we will all be restored and reconciled to the living God. Who is Savior and Healer  of all Men…The WORLD!!!!!!!!!!


  1. D. says:

    Hello, Wendy,
    Wow, your journey mirrors my own in a few ways. Thank you *so* much for sharing here, because you helped me A LOT!
    A book that just came out that really speaks to this is Rob Bell’s “Love Wins”– check it out! I’m on my third read, just trying to let it all sink in.
    I hope to leave my own story here soon… but I’m still working everything out. Please pray for me!
    Grace, peace, love,

    • Wendy says:

      Thank you for reading and for your comment. I will be praying for you and look forward to reading your story. Please Stop by and let me know when you have it available.

      Much peace and Blessings be yours …

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Recovering From: Eternal Hell, and Legalism of Religion
Home Town: Colorado Springs, Co
Current Belief: Christian Universalist

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